One father too many

Daly is SO ridiculous! And as a Christian, he's forgetting something.

JESUS HAD TWO DADS!

I'm still waiting for Mr. Daly to condemn single (straight) parents for doing a disservice for their children.

Daly's argument about social opprobrium sounds like the condemnations of Murphy Brown's single motherhood two decades ago. Then and now, the condemnations didn't make sense, since it's not likely that huge numbers of people would find single parenthood more attractive over being a parent in a marriage. The argument is even more out of place on this topic. Here, Daly's argument implies that there's something tempting about same-sex parenthood, requiring public disapproval of it to steer people toward opposite-sex parenthood. That may stem from the false but VERY common belief that people can be swayed to homosexuality through external influences.

I'm still waiting for Mr. Daly to condemn single (straight) parents for doing a disservice for their children. All those families are missing either a mom or a dad. Which according to Mr. Daly is critical to a child's upbringing. Yet these subpar families get a free-pass from Mr. Daly because the one remaining parent just happens to be heterosexual. How convenient for him. Hypocritical, but convenient.

"In fact, the president and I share this common background."

And you became the president and CEO of a national organization, while Obama became the president of the freaking United States of America.

Explain to me again your one-parent handicap.

Thank you, Mr. Daly, for standing up for the truth. Sadly there are some here who strive mightily to deny it.

This gentleman is entitled to his opinion. Thankfully, our First Amendment still allows people to make total fools of themselves and he does an excellent job of it. He has zero research to prove his points. But, hey, when have religious conservatives ever allowed the truth to stand in their way?

Even though our founding fathers of this nation wrote the Constitution under the premise that 'all men are created equal' believing that this is one of God's covenants, today America does not believe this simple truth that our Constitution was written on. The Tea Party, the old Moral Majority, and the Christian Right want us to go back and follow the Constitution, but they are unwilling to follow this one premise that the US Con. was predecated on.

As a Christian and a believer that the Bible is the Holy word of God, this is where the contradiction in America is now. What do we follow: the Bible or the US Constitution and meld the two together.

This is my delimma as well. I believe that in the US we are a nation of laws and the Law of the US Con. states that all men are created equal and thus should be treated equally under the law.

I also practice my Christianity by following the word of Christ in my daily life. I have great friends and family members who are gay and I love them dearly, but at the end 'of our day' there is only one person each of us will answer to and that is God. At that point in time we will surely know if we are right or not.

The challenge for us all is to develop a society that encourages, looks after, prospers all of its members to create a better world regardless of our background, make-up, because we are Americans and as a Christian believer that all will come know Jesus Christ as well.

We all need to get our own house in order because we are only as strong as the weakest one. Right now we are all weak because we all have seperate agendas of morallity instead of fights to make our country one strong nation under God as the Pledge of Alliegance states.

Dear author,

Join us in this century. Evolve, adapt. 2 loving parents raising a child is important. And if, as I assume you would desire, abortion becomes illegal, you are going to need many many willing couples, single parents and otherwise to raise the hordes of unwanted children.

Your bgiotry based on 2000 year old doctrine disgusts me

Have you raised a child lately?

Have you a clue about the time required to do this, and do this well?

You want to raise a child all by yourself, good luck. It's tough.

But two parents make it a little more manageable.

"It is a fundamental human right to be raised by one's own natural mother and father if that is at all feasible."

If that were really true, it would be illegal to put a child up for adoption.

But banning gay marriage doesn't magically make gay parents straight. Nor does it ensure that every natural father or mother is available, willing, or capable of raising their kids. It just damages the lives and families of kids being raised by gay parents.

Restricting legal protections to families raising biological children does nothing to help kids being raised by their biological parents, and only hurts those who aren't. Why would you seek to punish kids, who didn't choose their families, for not living in YOUR idea of the perfect family? Why deny some kids legal protections for their family, and the legal, social, and emotional benefits of securely married parents, just because you don't like their "choice" of parents? Why damage some kids' lives even further just because you don't think they're being raised in the "ideal" situation? Even if gay people's kids are only getting half a loaf (not something I believe at all, mind you, but for the sake of argument...), is it really the compassionate response to snatch the loaf they have away?

Mr. Daly "Focus on the Family" aren't ALL parents part of a FAMILY. How does your God define family. "the greatest of these is love" is waht I remember reading.

Mr. Daly I don't understand your issue...two loving parents irregardless of gender can provide a family to children in need of adoption...President Obama had the courage to speak to the matter in a positive and senstive manner...something you seemed to lack.

"The truth is that 30 years of research indicates that absence of a father or mother DOES make a substantial statistical difference in outcomes such as criminal behavior, drug abuse, educational performance, early pregnancy, etc. "

You're using research on SINGLE parenting to insult families with TWO same-sex parents. Not at all comparable. The absence of one of the usual pair of caring, attentive, committed parents DOES matter. The absence of a vag1na or a pen1s on the bodies of the caretaking couple DOES NOT. The number of available, loving parental caretakers matter, and that is documentable. Their gender does not.

If I magically turned male tomorrow, or my husband female, would we suddenly be unfit parents?

"Catken, if I'm ever in trouble, I want YOU at my side!"

Thanks! My Unitarian Jihad name is Sister Pointy Stick of Reasoned Debate. Look for me in the front lines when the debate breaks out, bearing the Sacred Offering (coffee and cookies). http://www.sfgate.com/cgi-bin/article.cgi?file=/c/a/2005/04/08/DDG27BCFLG1.DTL

President Obama's inclusion of two father families appears incendiary only to ignorant homophobes. What makes this particularly outrageous is that this bigotry is based on a selective, prejudiced reading of the Bible. The Bible calls eating shellfish an abomination - does Jim Daley eat shrimp? Christ said ZERO about homosexuality yet clearly condemned divorce - how many of Jim Daley's brethren are divorced? Etc, etc, etc, etc, etc. I'm sick of self-righteous religious bigots who hide behind "faith" to promote hate, ignorance and prejudice.

It is a fundamental human right to be raised by one's own natural mother and father if that is at all feasible.

Without debating that assertion for the moment, no one is arguing that children already being raised by straight opposite-sex parents should be instead raised by same-sex parents. It's not like the gay version of Child Protective Services is going to take straight couples' children away.

Why is a representative of a hate group allowed to comment on the subject of the groups intended discrimination.

Shame on the Post.

Daly,

There is a substantial body of evidence that says that children of same-sex couples do no better or worse than those of opposite-sex couples. And yet that same evidence shows that having two parents, married to one another is beneficial to the children compared to having one parent or two unmarried parents.

Which suggests that (GASP!) they actually don't need both a mother and a father. Two parents of any gender will do splendidly. By opposing same-sex marriage, you are causing harm to children.

This is from real evidence, rather than your sneaking suspicion that children raised by same-sex couples must be more screwed up on average.

Are you man enough to discard your unfounded assumption when you are clearly shown to be mistaken? I doubt it. That evidence has been out there for some time and it's been growing steadily, yet your kind continues to ignore it because gosh darn it, they just know queers raising kids is bad.

Per the most basic facts of life, every human being has a natural mother and father (and one each, needless to say). It is a fundamental human right to be raised by one's own natural mother and father if that is at all feasible.

Elevating? The president did nothing more than acknowledge actuality! Actuality of families like Gary & Tony's (CNN tonight, 8PMET). How dare Jim Daly suggest that our families were previously in some morality basement before the President pulled us up and allowed us to see the White House light?!

Equating? It's not the President's job to make blanket statements saying that this kind of person or that kind person is wrong, or to cast judgment against this family or that family. Now, government policies have long done so against LGBT people and their kin, as this heterosexist, unequal world discriminates against our peeps every single day. And no, this administration has not remedied that situation. But when it comes to proclamations like this Father's Day one, this is not a President who is going to wage a rhetorical war against certain kinds of dads! And let's be honest: That is what Jim Daly wants. In his view, anything less than a condemnation = an agenda.

Depriving? How offensive! Who is to say that a mom and a dad family structure has earned a gold pass? And then to suggest that the President is "perhaps unknowingly" going about this supposed deprival? Well we would say that it's Jim Daly who is perhaps unknowingly offending millions of people who come up in this world through a home that doesn't meet FOtF's standards (including many subpar mom, dad homes, btw!)

MARKDANIEL WROTE: “hate to burst your bubble, but 30 years of research has indicated that there is no difference between children raised by gay parents and children raised by hetero parents……a report was published in the journal Pediatrics detailing a 17-year longitudinal study about children of lesbian parents. The authors are Gartrell and Bos. Go ahead and look it up. There's this thing called Google. It should only take a few seconds. There's no reason to continue being ignorant of the facts.”

Don’t worry, you haven’t burst my bubble and I presume you would not want to be ignorant of the facts. The truth is that 30 years of research indicates that absence of a father or mother DOES make a substantial statistical difference in outcomes such as criminal behavior, drug abuse, educational performance, early pregnancy, etc. Even President Obama agrees with this. The obvious fact that individual cases may vary from the norm doesn’t invalidate the generalization, derived from mountains of research, that the absence of a mother or a father is associated with poorer outcomes. The very SMALL body of studies on gay families, which nearly all focus on lesbian families, have been plagued with methodological problems. This includes the recent study you referred to by Gartrell and Bos. This study relied upon small, unrepresentative samples of same-sex and heterosexual couples. Given the methodological limits of the study, valid conclusions cannot be drawn. The Gartrell and Bos study collected data on only 78 children through the mothers’ self-reporting on their child’s welfare. Furthermore, the study explains these mothers were recruited by volunteering for the study (rather than randomly selected) via announcements at “lesbian events, women’s bookstores, and in lesbian newspapers throughout metropolitan areas of Boston, Washington DC and San Francisco.” It doesn’t take a researcher to see the methodological problems with the study.

Thank you, Mr. Daly. Prof. Oboobma, a stealthy yet radical anti-family extremist, has lost no time spreading this kind of filth throughout the executive branch. We need to hold the Republican opposition accountable for exposing and challenging him at every opportunity, but it is also going to be up to organizations and ordinary citizens to push back against such depraved idiocy.

Of all the things I disagree with on Obama, this is one thing I do agree with. Christianity imported homophobia into the America's with the arrival of the Spanish in the 1500's. Before then, many American Indian tribes supported the idea of a 3rd gender, and families that loved them. It wasn't until Christians used this to determine Indians "savages" and then subsequently killed them all off, that Indians were reprogramed in Christian "Indian Schools". Christians are murderers who stole Judiac ideals to meet their own ends. Jesus himself was a gay man, who never once married, but lived his entire life with other men. Until Christians accept this little fact of life, then well, they should stay out of deciding what is right in God's eyes.

As long as people consider themselves "conservatives" and "liberals" and NOT AMERICANS FIRST, they are nothing more than the original stuff they use to fertlize lawns.

How abjectly INHUMANE of you to criticize some poor kid who lives in a same-sex household, or the same-sex couple that devote their lives toward bringing that same child up into the world.

"Societal norms?" Gimme a break. It was a societal norm for black people to be in slavery. It was a societal norm for people to stone Jewish people and deprive them of their homes and property. It used to be a "societal norm" for men to steal women and forcibly take them to marry.

What an unbelievably heartless Philistine you are. I fervently hope in your next life you are born gay so that you can experience first hand the bigotry you seek to uphold in the name of beliefs generated by the nomads of the Levant more than 2,000 years ago. I hope your doctors use their medical beliefs to treat you!

These "Christians" are such shining examples of humanity!

I hate to burst your bubble, but 30 years of research has indicated that there is no difference between children raised by gay parents and children raised by hetero parents. That includes socially, academically and so on. Moreover, just this month a report was published in the journal Pediatrics detailing a 17-year longitudinal study about children of lesbian parents. The results showed that children of lesbian parents were rated higher than their peers socially, academically and in general competence, and had fewer social problems and other negatives. The authors are Gartrell and Bos. Go ahead and look it up. There's this thing called Google. It should only take a few seconds. There's no reason to continue being ignorant of the facts.

as Barry Soetoro Born In Hawaii?
For the record,H Barak Obama True name is Barry Soetoro, unless he's legally changed surname from his stepfather.

Signed:PHYSICIAN THOMAS STEWART von DRASHEK M.D.

Posted by: thomasxstewart1 | June 24, 2010 4:08 PM
---------------------------

Oh, looky.

One of Daly's Huckabee Haters and a Birther!

Matthew 7:1

: CradleEpiscopalian

You stopped reading the chapter too soon and missed what Jesus said. He said marriage between man and woman was sacred and made in heaven,and is the will of God, Therefore see Matt 7:6 and Matt 7:21-23

kofax wrote:

"It is one thing to have a different opinion, it is another to demonize and attack an individual or group simply because they don't agree with you."

Except when it is done by his/her "Christian" leaders like Dobson-lite Daly, Sarah Palin and "Pastor" Huckabee or by their teabagger trumpeters like Elder Beck, Limbaugh and RNC Fox News.

Was Barry Soetoro Born In Hawaii?
For the record,H Barak Obama True name is Barry Soetoro, unless he's legally changed surname from his stepfather.

If Barry Soetoro/Hon Barak Obama esq was born in Hawaii, then why doesn't Barry Soetoro :H. Barak Obama esq manifest an authentic birth certificate, Has Anyone even Searched For Barry Soetoro in Birth Records Produced for Drivers License to find Birth Certificate.

Signed:PHYSICIAN THOMAS STEWART von DRASHEK M.D.

Lots of GLBT parents seem to do a better job than straight parents. Many time they actually plan for and have to work hard at having children rather than the all to often hetero:"Whoops,honey guess what we're pregnant... what are we gonna do now we aren't so sure we really wanna have (another ) kid."

"Obama, almost daily, demonstrates his ignorance in any subject."

Since when is recognition that there exist very successfukl families outside of the norm - and recognition is all it is, not endorsement or anything else - constitute "ignorance"? It seems to me that acting as if reality doesn't exist and hiding one's head in the sand because of preconceived notions of what and what isn't appropriate in subjects that have absolutely no effect on you is what actually constitutes "ignorance".

Maybe I misunderstood your point GreatGrandmaSue - what exaxctly is "ignorant" about the President paying tribute to those who raise children?

Obama, almost daily, demonstrates his ignorance in any subject. He caters to anyone who will vote for him come 2012 so now he he swwoshing the gay community.
Figures.

"When these wingnuts begin advocating mandated marriage for unmarried parents, elimination of divorce for married parents, and prohibition of marriage for those who cannot or choose not to have children, then I might start listening to their opinions on gay marriage and gay parenting."

While I disapprove of calling them "wingnuts," I agree with your point. Daly's argument implies that parents who are gay should enter into straight marriages for the sake of their children, or remain in such marriages. One could make a case that children raised by unhappy, miserable parents in loveless marriages are generally worse off than if their parents had gotten divorced. In any case, the burden of proof is on Daly to show how children under the care of opposite-sex parents would lose this care if same-sex-parent families were not treated as abnormal.

Catken, if I'm ever in trouble, I want YOU at my side!

A respectfully expressed opinion, and I applaud the Washington Post for its inclusion of various view points. I'm impressed that the Post published this article. Well done!

Hey Jim, your time has come, you are a relic and need to go.

"Keep in mind that the notion of same sex parenting is extremely radical and unsupported by 1000s of years of history and an overwhelming body of research. "

Nonsense. Over thousands of years, in many cultures, humans have formed many different types of families and survived many different family arrangements. Many, many children have been raised by two adult caretakers of the same sex - whether due to widows, widowers or deserted spouses moving in with relatives of the same sex, or a secret or overt gay or lesbian couple. Many, many children, due to high parental death rates, have likewise been raised by single parents with whatever support structure they could manage. Many children have been raised successfully in family structures quite unlike the "traditional" European nuclear family, including matrilineages where a child's main caretakers are Mom and mother's brother, or patrilineal extended families where once the child is weaned, father's mother and unmarried sisters (and in some cases, co-wives) might provide as much or more maternal care than Mom does. The evidence suggests quite clearly and simply that humans are flexible, human societies variable, and human children very, very resilient.

"Most of these comments reflect a disturbing intolerance of conservative values."

Not at all. Live as you please, structure your families as you please, follow whatever value system you like. But don't pretend that you have the right to force everyone else to do likewise.

"ts pathetic that the forces behind gay rights force their beliefs on folks and then call anyone who disagrees a bigot."

Oh, I'm sorry. I didn't realize that you'd had your marriage taken away and your children left without legal security by gay activists who think it's unhealthy for your children to be raised by a mother and a father, and then called a bigot when you protested.

Oh, no, wait. That's what you're trying to do to OTHER people, not what they're trying to do to YOU. You're the one attacking other people's families, while they're quite happy to leave yours in peace, taking not one single legal right or protection from you. And you're also the one having the sheer GALL to call them "intolerant" because they refuse to accept YOUR sacred right not only to live as you please, but also to tell THEM how to live. Refusing to tolerate the interference of a perfect stranger in your personal life, marital and childrearing choices is not "bigoted", it's being a free and independent American.

You sound like the bully whining that his victim is "intolerant" because he doesn't tell the bully how kind he is for beating him up.

Mr. Daly, you had me at "The Obama administration is actively changing the cultural norms of our country."

More power to him. The days of your bigotry are numbered.

My husband and I parent with our hearts, minds, and hands - only the conception needed our genitals, and that's the least part of parenting. My husband is a fine father, I like to think I'm a good mom, and if he or I suddenly changed gender tomorrow, my son would not suffer in the least. It's love, attention, and care that make good parents, not possession of the correct set of dangly bits.

"An adoptive or surrogate parent can be the most wonderful and influential adult in a child's life. However, what is wrong is in saying "the same" or "as good as" the biological parent who is the most wonderful and influential adult in a child's life."

So my son's friend's adoptive parents, who love him, cherish him, care for him, discipline him, and nurture him, are not as good as the biological parents who left him? A little girl I know, who is being raised lovingly and devotedly by a father, uncle and grandmother after being abandoned by her mother in infancy would be better off with her deserting mother than with her caring uncle and grandma? How insulting.

Biological conception does not make you a good parent, or the best possible parent for your child.

Most of these comments reflect a disturbing intolerance of conservative values. It is one thing to have a different opinion, it is another to demonize and attack an individual or group simply because they don't agree with you. Keep in mind that the notion of same sex parenting is extremely radical and unsupported by 1000s of years of history and an overwhelming body of research. And by the way - don't bother citing some of the very recent articles that conclude fathers aren't necessary - such conclusions could only be made by relying on very recent and methodologically challenged studies conducted by researchers who concentrate primarily on activist,lesbian research, ignoring the massive body of mainstream research on how fathers make numerous unique and essential contributions to their children’s well-being and development. Its pathetic that the forces behind gay rights force their beliefs on folks and then call anyone who disagrees a bigot.

Matthew 7:1

Gosh, I wonder if Jim has a "luggage carrying" aide like the guy who just had his job at FF (not fist-f****ing but very similar).

Abandoned by his alcoholic father at age 5 Jim has stuggled all his life to know what a real man is. Seems like it was another heterosexual man who messed things up for him. Poor little Jim. Such a pretty boy.

My Jesus accepted people as they were, not in the image that Jim Daly thinks they should be.

Jim go work on your humility.

Each new declaration or action by our president confirms his simplistic and sometimes juvenile approach to major issues that confront our nation. His handling of the oil spill situation continues to border on criminal malfeasance of duty. He is ruling by fiat to satisfy his own ideals with little regard for the will of the people. Is it too soon to now begin impeachment proceedings?

When these wingnuts begin advocating mandated marriage for unmarried parents, elimination of divorce for married parents, and prohibition of marriage for those who cannot or choose not to have children, then I might start listening to their opinions on gay marriage and gay parenting. Until that point, their words on those topics are simply hypocritical and bigoted.

I think that out of the entire speech, you only listened to two words. If you gave thought to the rest of what the speech was about, I would have probably enjoyed reading your thoughts on it.

Hey Daily, may God bless you with a gay child or grandchild. It opened the cold, closed, "Christian" heart of your Lord Cheney so there's hope for you, too.

"A mom and a dad."

Why, then, is not Daily bashing families broken by divorce, jail or death? Are these still OK if they originally included a man and a woman?

What would be better in his "Christian" mind - a child suffering a drug addict (including alcohol and nicotine) single mother or two loving and nurturing partners of the same sex.

Screw the children as long as their parents aren't gay is equal to FOF's protect the children before they're born but educating them and providing them health care after is socialism.

Jesus weeps.

Reminder to Mr. Day and like thinkers. . . "the greatest of these is love."

"A very transparent (for a change) attempt to take advantaqe of a national holiday to push his personal agenda!!"

Actually you are the one wishing to promote your personal agenda. The President is merely acknowledging what already exists in reality - it is apparently your agenda to pretend that such people don't exist. I'm glad that the President - the President of ALL Americans - doesn't share your narrow-minded bigotry.

The author is a bigot. He has no clear conception of the cultural norms of our country. Any poll could fill him in. Baby Boomers share his opinions, the younger generations do not.

It is sad that a "Christian" organization seeks to exclude people rather than include all people in God's love. I think that Jesus would have welcomed the GLBT community, just as he did Romans, tax collectors, etc. But then again, what do I know, I'm just a church lady.

I don't think "The Obama administration is actively changing the cultural norms of our country."

What is normal in our country's culture today is two people, of the same sex and in a loving relationship, raising children together in happy, heathy homes.

I find it offensive that the Post is providing a national forum for Mr. Daly to promote discrimination and incite hatred. If others want to read this outdated and hurtful nonsense they are free to go to the FOTF website--but the Post shouldn't be complicit in promoting Mr. Daly's incendiary diatribe.

The author obviously doesn't know many people, or knows people all of the same kind. Many men are capable of being just as nurturing and caring and understanding as women, and many women are just as capable of giving tough love and being disciplinarian as men. Mr. Daly's argument rests on a rigid parallel between someone's sex and their role in society; it goes against Jesus' central teaching to accept people as they are, and in all varieties.

With all homosexuals bashing Day I just want to say I agree with him!
Further, obama cannot "order" a change in our culture - he can only support change. And I found his comments, coming on Fathers Day, particularly in poor taste! A very transparent (for a change) attempt to take advantaqe of a national holiday to push his personal agenda!!
His egotism knows no bounds!!
He never misses an opportunity to attempt to knock America and its traditions!

Fatherhood is not a natural state for human
males. It is a judeo-christian survival-of-the-species construct resulting from the collapse of human life in the aftermath of the Roman Empire and later starting around 1348 with the onset of the bubonic plague. Your heteronormative
'mom and dad' arrangement not only made a lot of sense in agrarian societies, it was imperative. In today's overpopulated world, fatherhood can be socially coerced or elective. Hats off to any man or men who are inclined to try to make a success of it and given the massive repression and spectacular social failure
that masculinity suffered in the twentieth century, all volunteers to the state of fatherhood should probably be honored and welcomed.

"In elevating and equating the influence of a two-father family to that of all other traditional forms, the administration is, perhaps unknowingly, depriving children of the opportunity to have the very thing the president has so strongly and eloquently suggested they need most: A mom and a dad."

Now wait a damn minute...Even if one grant Daly's claim that acknowledging two-father families means "elevating and equating" them with traditional families (and I don't grant the claim), how in the world would that lead to children being deprived of mothers? That only makes sense if that "elevating" would lead millions of straight fathers to kick mothers out of their homes and replace them with gay lovers. Daly's argument could easily justify social pressure for single or widowed parents to marry against their will. He seems to view the traditional families as something that people would naturally avoid without such social pressure, regardless of orientation.

The "single incendiary sentence" that President Obama uttered began with this: "Nurturing families come in many forms."

Jim Daly tells us that this is a scenario that "science simply does not support." Obviously, he's wrong, but you have to ask what size blinders he wears that permit him to believe in such abject idiocy.

Nurturing comes from compassion and love. As far as I know, there is no scientific research demonstrating that the synergism of male and female is the only source from which the ingredients of compassion and love can be produced.

What science HAS demonstrated is that children raised in homes with loving caregivers and a consistent environment routinely do better emotionally, mentally, academically, and physically than kids coming from two-parent (female and male) households in which there is stress, argument, and hostility between the parents.

Daly's view of the White House Father's Day celebration is the kind of "Christian" thinking that seeks to exclude instead of to embrace. Somehow, I just don't think that's what Jesus had in mind.

many social norms have been broken, let the two fathers explain to their children, how they were born. Pretty soon children will be asking the DID YOU COPULATE?
Posted by: jayrkay

If the fathers explain to the children the method of their conception, the kids will not need to ask "Did you copulate?"
And let's be honest, how many kids spend a lot of time thinking about their parents knocking boots? For most kids, that's just not a mental visual they want, regardless of their parents' orientation.

many social norms have been broken, let the two fathers explain to their children, how they were born. Pretty soon children will be asking the DID YOU COPULATE?

My same sex partner and I have raised a son that is the envy of our straight friends. He is extremely successful, compassionate and a contributor to his community. I find it ironic if not somewhat sad that many of our opposite sex couple friends are constantly battling with their children to at least try to finish school, call them once and a while and quite living off the their parents and the government.

Maybe we need more same sex parents.

A cold hearted bigot.

**And by the inclusion of controversy, mothers and fathers are being attacked.**

How so? My relationship with my daughter is not in any way damaged or even threatened by APaganPlace's relatioship with her daughter.
The only people who have the power to damage (or to improve) ANY relationship are the people IN that relationship.
Families headed by gay couples are not a threat to families headed by straight couples.

"An adoptive or surrogate father may be the best caretaker for a child. But the reality which must be acknowledged is that there is another father"

This is incredibly insulting to adoptive parents. My husband and I are parents to a son by adoption and a daughter born to us. My husband is not a "caretaker" of our son, he is his father.

We acknowledge his biological father and his genetic contribution, which is important since our son is of a different race than we are, but in every other aspect my husband is the father of our son.

Our son and daughter are both adults and raising them was the hardest and most rewarding thing we have done in our lives. Raising children is very difficult, but it is easier with a partner. It doesn't matter whether those parents are of opposite sexe or the same sex, what matters is the love and care they give their children and the support they give eath other.

Focus on the family is nothing but a bigoted organization that spends the majority of its time fighting against gay rights under the guise of christianity. I have to assume that this is the primary objective of christian groups -- not helping people, feeding people, housing people, etc., etc. By giving him space in the newspaper, the post might as well give space to proponents of black slavery and neo-nazis -- I have yet to see those ideologies promulgated. And what about all the absent fathers deserting their families, incapable of emotional relationship. abusive, both physically and mentally, and of course, the slacker fathers who refuse to financially support their families. More space is needed to discuss the failure of traditional fathers who help create the divorce rate of over 50% of "traditional" marriages. Daly, I just can't wait until one of your children or grandchildren is gay. Of course, you will be to blame - instead of fathering you spend your time writing hateful missives on subjects of which you know nothing about. And to the post, let's see some hateful columns on other minorities and see how far that gets you!

Wasn't this one of Obama's campaign promises? He said he would do this. I guess we are not used to politicians actually keeping their promises.

Love is love is love. There doesn't seem to be enough of it to go around many times, so why discourage it when it appears between two stable, mature adults regardless of their genitalia? Children are neglected and abused or loved and supported not with regard to the sexual makeup of their parents, but because their parents are responsible, responsive and competent.

Mr. Daly,

Please learn the difference between compliment and complement.

The content of your essay doesn't merit a response. My family is just fine, thank you.

Kids need parents who make them feel loved, wanted, and secure. Everything else, including number, gender, and amount of DNA shared between child and parents, is negotiable.

Why are "orthodox-christians" so afraid of gay people. Are they forced to participate?

Do these people threaten their man-woman marriages with too much temptation like Ted Haggard? (albeit the methamphetamines probably helped to reduce his inhibitions)

Are they so insecure in their own sexuality that gays are a threat? Are they worried their children or grandchildren (their small and shallow god forbid) might be gay?

Why do they think their cherry-picked scriptures have credibility with and authority over the rest of us?

Is this and the abortion issue really the only things that their version of Jesus represents?

Daly's essay is pathetic but his mindset is pitiable.

" Although good people can differ on strategy and tactics, I believe Christians who are committed to engaging and transforming the culture are wise to engage those with the authority to transform and reform public policy itself." I agree and thus publicly applaud President Obama for stating out loud that healthy loving families come in all forms. FOTF is a toxic organization and I keep a prayer in my heart for their eventual enlightenment.

Every year tolerances wins more of the American population over; soon Jim Daly will be in the minority group on the gay rights issue. If trends hold true we are only talking 5-10 years. I suspect gay marriage will win out in the courts before that.

Mr. Daly I have some advice; get use to it. Soon your way of thinking will be considered caveman just as racial discrimination is considered caveman by the majority today.

This article is just a knee jerk reaction to homosexuality being mentioned by the president without a negative connotation. Obama didn't say which parental situation is ideal, he said that nurturing families come in all forms. Does that author think that a two father home can't be nurturing?

A lot of the most screwed up people I know were raised by a mother and father. I'd venture to say that a lot of two father homes are bound to be very nurturing for the simple reason that they CHOSE to be parents. Nobody accidentally knocks up their gay partner.

What a bigot. Mr. Wolpe, in his piece elsewhere, laments that atheists are angry, and this dip%$#t comes and takes objection to "two fathers" and "two mothers". Invents a controversy where there was none. The president is a president of the entire nation, not just these bigots. He has a constitutional duty to make the oppressed minorities feel they are part of the national fabric. If these bigots don't want to be part of the fabric, they are very welcome to move out to some equatorial forests in Brazil, or better still into the deserts of Saudi Arabia. This is the most disgusting vituperative SCAT I have seen on this blog. Mr. Daly you ought to be ashamed of yourself.

Maybe Dobson-lite Daily could spend his time getting reproductions of "The Last Supper" banned. The two guys to the right of Jesus look pretty gay to me.

An adoptive or surrogate parent can be the most wonderful and influential adult in a child's life. However, what is wrong is in saying "the same" or "as good as" the biological parent who is the most wonderful and influential adult in a child's life. This effort to tear down the ideal goal in order to prop up via political correctness an ideal which, in truth, can never be "the same" is the problem. I speak as someone for whom my own biological parents were not the most wonderful role models, for which failures I have forgiven them. We cannot support justice by committing an injustice. An adoptive or surrogate father may be the best caretaker for a child. But the reality which must be acknowledged is that there is another father. If gay couples were "the same" as traditional one-man, one-woman couples, then there would be no reason for gay couples because traditional marriage would fit the bill. All this is simply a matter of reality. For those of us of faith, the issues are ten times more than this. And by the inclusion of controversy, mothers and fathers are being attacked. To say otherwise is to elevate ideology over truth - not that such surprises where this current administration is concerned. The greater lie is that some people, allegedly so smart, don't know precisely what they are attacking and corrupting, using and exploiting the naive, idealistic, self-interested and ignorant to do so. Read history. Know human nature. And do not trust people without honor and integrity, who lie routinely.

So step-fathers and and foster-fathers and good kind male role models don't count. Biological dads are the only Real Thing.

Most kids don't care what daddy does with his nether parts - they care about what he does with his heart.

"""Two fathers" is impossible. Each and every child has one mother and one father regardless of Obama's statements. Obama can say whatever he wants; he, no any other human, can change the basic biology...""

Do you go out of your say that when widows with kids remarry, or anyone is adopted?

In reference to my previous comment; the article I posted does not reflect or represent my personal views or beliefs.I only wanted to present an interesting article I found on this subject matter to stimulate thought and fuel the discussion.

You might want to read this TIME article, Jim...

http://www.time.com/time/health/article/0,8599,1994480,00.html

"Two fathers" is impossible. Each and every child has one mother and one father regardless of Obama's statements. Obama can say whatever he wants; he, no any other human, can change the basic biology...

Funny how Mr. Daly represents an organization that is part of the chorus that demands that young Barack Obama would be a more worthy human if he had a father figure in his life... Just hot his actual father. If *he's* mentioned, Barack Obama is crypto-Muslim.

Right?

Interesting.

And they demand in fact that somehow it's better to have one Mommy than two, or one Daddy than two, ...which is the opposite of facts.

The 'traditional straight family' ...as long as one of the partners isn't of another religion.

Interesting.

But clearly totally-incorrect. That is, if you don't deny that a dude who became a damn fine President of the United States seems to have done OK raised without a father at all.

Or was that the implication?

Either way, breaking up gay families hurts children, Mr. Daly.

And there's no talking around that.

Reading this, I am reminded we're listening to the dying gasps of an old, sad mentality. History is not on your side, Mr. Daly; your kind are dying off. LGBT parents are everywhere now; in small towns, in the PTA, on TV, the Internet - in short, new generations see just plain, normal, same-sex partners raising plain, normal, good kids. The gnashing of your teeth can't be heard over their sheer ordinariness. Goodbye.

"But the fatherhood 'effect' is not cumulative - two daddies are not better than one -- nor is a mother dispensable or replaceable."

Very nice platitudes, Mr. Daly. Now prove them. Most recent studies do not bear out your conclusion that a mommy and a daddy somehow makes a better family than the other alternatives.

Okay we get it, Focus is still anti-homosexual. Mr. Daly has registered his discontent with the President as is his right, and his duty to represent his organization and its funders. Now, can we please set the culture war aside for a bit and get on with God's work of supporting ALL children no matter their parent's choices?

Congratulations. I was glad to see a Focus leader dissenting civilly and without resorting to the wingnuttery I have come to expect from Focus on the Family (heretic,atheist, and humanist didn't come up once!). Keep the civil and cooperative attitude and I am sure public/private cooperation to support families can advance.

fr the article:

>...But the inclusion of the reference to two fathers and two mothers is clearly a deliberate and strategic decision. Even those most sympathetic and enthusiastic about the president's agenda acknowledge that President Obama is very carefully and quietly transforming homosexual politics and policy on the federal level. With the use of his executive authority he is actively engaged in an attempt to normalize the public's perception of homosexuality, from supporting the repeal of the military's "don't ask, don't tell" policy to extending and expanding health care coverage for homosexual partners of federal employees....

As a gay Christian woman who is married to my lovely WIFE, I must say that fotf is well-known for its' anti-gay diatribes. There is NOTHING wrong with a gay or lesbian couple raising children. Why doesn't fotf work on reducing divorce, spousal abuse and child abuse, instead of constantly harping on glbt people? We're families too.

Not sure of the point here. Are you saying that "two fathers" doesn't belong on the same list as a single (in the marital sense) father? The President didn't say that option was as good as a mom and dad.