One of my favorite scenes from the Qur'an is a story about Abraham. 2:260: And when Abraham said, "My Lord, show me how you give life to the dead," He said, "Have you no faith, then?" "Yes,: said Abraham, "but just to put my heart at ease." So God said, "Take four birds and train them to come back to you. Then place them on separate hilltops, call them back, and they will come flying to you. And know that God is all powerful and wise."
This from a man who held conversations with God on a regular basis.
How much more so, then, would your average human being who "knows" God only through His signs, through revelation, or through an innate sense of connection with the Divine be susceptible to doubts?
And how much more than your average human being would be one who dealt daily with the grave injustices of the world? One who lived among the impoverished -- not because they were lazy or rash, but because of where and to whom they had been born. A woman who lived among the ill, people who had no access to doctors and medicines, who lived in squalid conditions that made their illness all the worse. The stark contrast between the haves and the have-nots -- her benefactors vs. those she served -- the apparent abandonment by God of the poor and the helpless would be enough to shake the faith of anyone.
There are times when I think a loving God cannot exist and let His creations suffer the way he has allowed people to suffer. There are times when I feel God must be a capricious monster, to allow people who declare themselves of faith to perpetrate such terrible acts as we see going on in Darfur, Iraq, and on 9/11.
These are balanced by the times when I am overwhelmed by the sense of God's mercy and love for His creation as expressed in natural beauty. Times when I feel God has showered me with more blessings and love than anyone ever can be grateful enough for, that He has picked me up and placed me in the exact spot where I get the things I most need.
That Mother Teresa experienced doubt, in the midst of the incredible suffering that God allows to go on, is only to be expected. Even under the best of conditions humans have doubted; how can we be surprised that under the worst of them, we continue to do so?
Please e-mail On Faith if you'd like to receive an email notification when On Faith sends out a new question.
Email Me | Del.icio.us | Digg | Facebook

