Whether holidays are happy or not depends largely on personal and private moods and situations.

Observations of culture-wide tensions and unhappinesses usually fall into two zones:

1) Most holidays have some sort of religious cast--even "civil" holidays tend to. Those rooted in particular religious traditions are most likely to induce tension.

This is the case in "mixed marriages" or in citizen arguments about public displays.

Mixed marriages: people bring highest expectations to holidays, and so they make greatest demands on each other. It may well be that holidays are the WORST time to try to solve anything. Relax. Enjoy "both" (or more) traditions and sets of customs. They are NOT the same; they have different stories and promises. But these stories do not conflict at all points. They are often parallel and overlapping. I'd advise halves of split families not to try to score points or settle anything. Sit back. Listen to the other side; Learn from each other.

Citizen disputes: as churches and synagogues and families neglect the gatherings where holidays are celebrated, they want the public order to take over. That's the worst place. For example, you can mount a creche on a hundred thousand private lawns and almsot everyone will cheer. Insist that your symbols have monopoly or privilege on the court house lawn or in school and you are demeaning your own faith and trampling on the ways of others. Why make the public order have to compensate for our failure to "do" holidays in their natural habitats.

2) Other unhappinesses? We don't notice them so much as we scurry to and from work and meet deadlines; When we relax, let things go, "idle," we expect too much and bring up all the unhealed things that we don't attend to on non-holidays. We defeat the purpose of holidays in such cases. Again, advice; relax. Enjoy. Reach out to people to whom you can bring happiness.