Guest Voices

Domestic Abuse is Never God's Will

By Samina Ahmad
Physician

I once worked in a women's medical ward in Lahore, Pakistan. I often treated women who had been abused. "Who gave you a black eye?" I would ask one woman. No response. "Who threw acid on your face?" I would ask another woman. Again, no response.

I always knew the answer. The perpetrator was the husband. The victims had different faces but the crime remained the same -- domestic violence -- and was never reported. Victims went back to their spouses after healing their physical wounds, never knowing how long this cycle of abuse would continue or if it would ever end. Many times it did end with a death.

Does Islam allow wife beating? I have been asked this question many times. The core of the question comes from a particular verse in the Qur'an (An Nisa, Verse 34), which has been misinterpreted on its face to allow wife beating. That misunderstanding is based on a surface reading of the translation.

To determine the true meaning of the Qur'an, it must be read and interpreted in letter and spirit. According to the Qur'an, the relationship between the husband and the wife should be based on mutual love and kindness. Any excess, cruelty, family violence or abuse committed by any Muslim can never be traced to any revelatory text (Qur'an or Hadith).

Such excesses and violations are to be blamed on the person who commit the acts -- acts which show they are only paying lip service to Islamic teachings and are failing to follow in the footsteps of Prophet Muhammad, who never hit any female. In fact, the Prophet used to say that the best of men are those who do not hit their wives. It is evident from many authentic traditions that the Prophet himself intensely detested the idea of beating ones wife. He forbade the beating of any woman with the words, "never beat God's handmaidens."

Don't judge Islam by the ignorant or self-serving practices of Muslims like Muzammil Hassan, who has been charged with the heinous crime of beheading his wife Aasiya Hassan. Judge Islam by what the Qur'an and Sunnah say.

Living without violence is a right every woman should enjoy, regardless of age, race, economic status or religion. Religion can be a factor in some cases of domestic abuse but it's never the cause. No religion permits or condones violence. Abuse is never God's will. It's always the responsibility of the perpetrator and that is who we must hold accountable.

Dr. Samina Ahmad is a scriptwriter, director, producer and most recently the
host of a global wellness feature on downtowntv.com.

By Samina Ahmad |  March 3, 2009; 9:19 AM ET
Share: Email a Friend | Technorati talk bubble Technorati | Del.icio.us | Digg | Facebook
Previous: Beheading a Wake-Up Call for Muslim Americans | Next: Sufism as Youth Culture in Morocco

Comments

Please report offensive comments below.



With respect, this seems a bit naive at best, more likely illusionmaking.

The Qu'ran is full enough of references to male superiority, female inferiority, obedience and servitude, and violence in general that even loose readings of these verses easily supports the outcome that we see in many islamic countries. Women DO have second class status, and worse. If you have seen these cases as much as you have I find it difficult to believe that you disagree that the religion and religious environment of muslim theocracies do support and condone, vocally or nonverbally, abuse of women. This seems more like denial.

Western women only recently have gotten parity with men, at least legally. In the reality of it, they are still fighting for equality. There is still a lot of domestic violence in the west, America for sure, and in part the cause for that violence can be traced to religious roots. It is probably the case the world over, with religions playing their patriarchal parts to keep a good woman down...

You make some idealist statements that religion is never the cause of domestic violence, does not permit it or condone it, and that it is against "God's will". Please. The God of Abraham apparently loves violence against all kinds of evils and foreigners, women and children included, and was happy to instruct the believers to perpetrate harm upon the enemy combatant.

Islam has a very peaceful heart, as well as a history of violence. Everybody does. Skeletons are in the closets of all peoples and religions. Acid in the face of the wife is nothing to have pride in, but it does happen with unfortunate regularity in some societies, and religion plays a part. Talking about the truth only moves truth forward. Talking de nial only floats a dreamboat lazily down illusion alley.

Denial is no support for the women that are seeking shelter and love.

Posted by: justillthen | March 4, 2009 3:58 PM
Report Offensive Comment

Samina says:

“They(Muslims) are only paying lip service to Islamic teachings and are failing to follow in the footsteps of Prophet Muhammad, who never hit any female.”

It is precisely because they are following in the footsteps of Mohammad that these crimes against humanity in general and women in particular are committed. Your prophet did much worse than hit a female. He had sent an assassin to butcher Asma bint Marwan, a mother of half a dozen underage children, while they were around her as she was nursing their baby brother. All that just because she was reported to have made an uncomplimentary comment about him. Another one of his victims was a very old woman by the name of Um Qirfa whose body was torn in halves on direct orders of the “Messenger of Allah” simply because she wrote an unflattering verse about him. There are other documented facts about him striking his wives, but the above incidents recorded in the accepted seera (bibliography) and ahadith ( history of Mohammad according to his contemporaries) should give a glimpse of the man considered by his followers as the perfect model of a human.

Posted by: abhab | March 4, 2009 12:00 AM
Report Offensive Comment

If God exists, this spirit would never approve of abuse of any kind. However, there is no proof of God. Religion was written by men. Religion sanctions abuse. People who are religious zealots practice the worst elements of their religions and use religion as an a valid reason for abusing women. Islam is the worst offender of all. The Koran is full of passages that make women nothing more than chattel of men.

Posted by: mmm1110 | March 3, 2009 7:48 PM
Report Offensive Comment

does Christianity support the death penalty or the near-indefinite detention of convicted criminals in inhumane conditions of confinement?

it is not some abstract concept that allows these things, it is men, who do these things and allow them to go on, unpunished.

Posted by: dubya19391 | March 3, 2009 6:50 PM
Report Offensive Comment

Samiha Ahmed says*the husband and the wife(wives) should be based on mutual love*
Which mutual love between one man and four women ? What is the *true meaning* of *women are your tilth* ?

*Judge Islam what the Quran says*.Yes,correct.They do what you advice ;
-Half inheritence
-Four women who have no divorce right(thay means slavery)
-Males excel women
-Man can scourge woman(sunnah can not change comments of quran)
-Two women equals one man
-For Adultery case,Bring only Four Males(woman is not valid)
-Women,stay at house
-She can not dress whatever she likes(she can not show her unwashed and dirty hairs,but she has to wash her brain five times in a day)

Posted by: halozcel1 | March 3, 2009 3:21 PM
Report Offensive Comment

My questions to the good author and the rest of the world are;"Is domestic abuse limited to the Islamic world only?" "Are countries like USA, France and UK etc. free of domestic abuse?" "Why Islamic spectrum has become so wide and so important in West's foreign policy and cultural fields?" Thank you.
Iqbal

Posted by: iqbalquadir | March 3, 2009 12:27 PM
Report Offensive Comment

Misinterpretation of said passage? What about the koranic passages that dictate Islamic world domination, submission of females and death to apostates and infidels? Are these passages also "misinterpreted". Simply delete all passages that are subject to misinterpretation. and reissue then the five billion non-Muslims in the world will believe you. Until then, we don't buy your excuses.

BTW, said current book was generated by the hallucinations of one long dead Arab who supposedly got his instructions from a "pretty, wingie, talking, flying, fictional thingie" named Gabriel. It all makes one scream out "THE SIGNIFICANT STUPIDITY OF ISLAM!!!!

Posted by: CCNL | March 3, 2009 11:57 AM
Report Offensive Comment

The comments to this entry are closed.

 
RSS Feed
Subscribe to The Post

© 2009 The Washington Post Company