Hi Ann,

Some great thinking here. This is an interesting blog, I agree it seems more realistic and more powerful to affirm something and set your intention to do something rather then swear to do it. I have never thought about this before but swearing, beside the profane aspect, reminds me of being a kid and repeating something like, “I cross my heart and hope to die, stick a needle in my eye.” To vow does feel like you must do something and cannot go back on it. Life does have its unexpected events and we cant always stay with what our original agreement was because the circumstances in which we agreed upon have changed.

Dr. Jennifer Howard
http://www.DrJenniferHoward.com

Norrie: We wrote our ceremony and allowed as how we'd stay together as long as we both felt like it.
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IMO, that's the best way to do it. After all, if one or both of you find that you no longer want to be together and you stay anyway, all you do is make yourself and the other person miserable.

Congrats on your wedding. You wrote: "I realized that I could not possibly say, 'This is my solemn vow.' To me a solemn vow is a promise and no one can keep a promise."

I don't agree. People can keep promises. Just because you and your current husband couldn't keep promises you made to your former spouses doesn't mean "no one" can do so. Christian marriage is not a contract; it's a covenant made between spouses and God. Plenty of people have kept the covenant they made with their spouse and God.

My wife and I were married in Vermont's State House, with many "political types" in attendance.

We wrote our ceremony and allowed as how we'd stay together as long as we both felt like it.

As he left the ceremony, an old pol said under his breath, "That's not how they do it in Barre" (a blue-collar, largely Catholic city, pop. 8900).

Thirty-five years have passed since then and we're still together, without benefit of oaths or vows.

Let me take exception to the silly idea that this country is a Christian nation. Although there are a few mentions of a Creator here and there, our founding documents are entirely devoid of any mention of Christianity. Should anyone argue that it should be presumptive because the founders were nominally Christian, note that not only where some founders deist or atheist, but they explicitly rejected sectarianism at every turn.

Let's stop with the conceit that our nation has anything to do with today's version of fundamentalist Christianity or that Christians have any special claim on the country. It's as meaningless as arguing that ours is a male, white or a powdered-wig nation.

In a world where trust has diminished the importance of an 'oath' is paramount in making a decision to give to another the crucible of our well-being and happiness.

Rarely do we allow such an exception; sadly since WWII when communities in the face of death relied heavily on each other, we find the connection has long been severed and we are left to rely on the oath sworn by every doctor and surgeon that life is paramount above all else and the oath sworn by judges to deliver justice.

My own oath to you the reader is that I will deliver to you, with the help of many other good Americans, the evil behind the mass murder of 3000 people in a single event on American soil.

Ms. Brower:

The United States was NOT founded as a Christian nation nor was the Constitution based on Christian principles. This nonsense destroys any credibilty you might have on anything. If you wish to pontificate about the history of our country, it would be wise to learn about it first.

But did the historic Jesus actually utter Mark 10:2-9 = Matt 19:3-8:

"/10:2/ Some Pharisees came, and to test him they asked, "Is it lawful for a man to divorce his wife?" /10:3/ He answered them, "What did Moses command you?" /10:4/ They said, "Moses allowed a man to write a certificate of dismissal and to divorce her." /10:5/ But Jesus said to them, "Because of your hardness of heart he wrote this commandment for you. /10:6/ But from the beginning of creation, 'God made them male and female.' /10:7/ 'For this reason a man shall leave his father and mother and be joined to his wife, /10:8/ and the two shall become one flesh.' So they are no longer two, but one flesh. /10:9/ Therefore what God has joined together, let no one separate."

= Matt 19:3-8
/19:3/ Some Pharisees came to him, and to test him they asked, "Is it lawful for a man to divorce his wife for any cause?" /19:4/ He answered, "Have you not read that the one who made them at the beginning 'made them male and female,' /19:5/ and said, 'For this reason a man shall leave his father and mother and be joined to his wife, and the two shall become one flesh'? /19:6/ So they are no longer two, but one flesh. Therefore what God has joined together, let no one separate." /19:7/ They said to him, "Why then did Moses command us to give a certificate of dismissal and to divorce her?" /19:8/ He said to them, "It was because you were so hard-hearted that Moses allowed you to divorce your wives, but from the beginning it was not so. "

According to Professor JD Crossan's exhaustive analysis, the historic Jesus did not. The passage is simply more embellishment of the life of one simple, preacher man.

Notes
John Dominic Crossan (an On Faith panelist)

Item: 252
Stratum: II (60-80 CE)
Attestation: Single
Historicity: -
Common Sayings Tradition: No

http://www.faithfutures.org/JDB/jdb252.html

Anne,
Marriage is suppose to be a vow of marriage is suppose to be forever. If your looking at it from the Christian tradition Jesus says what God has joined together,let not man put asunder. It is suppose to be vowed,it is suppose to be taken seriously.

But did the historic Jesus really say Matt 5:33-37??

http://wiki.faithfutures.org/index.php?title=372_Against_Oaths

Professor JD Crossan, an On Faith panelist after exhaustive study of the scriptural and non-scripturl documents concluded he did.

The Jesus Seminar concluded he did not.

However, this simple, preacher man had plenty of sources to borrow from:

Leviticus

Right or wrong, so not involve yourself in an oath. [Lev 6:3]

And you shall not swear by my name falsely,
so that you do not profane the name of your God. [Lev 19:12]

Sirach

Accustom not your mouth to swearing,
neither use thyself to the naming of the Holy One. [Sirach 23:9-11]

Philo

To swear not at all is the best course and most profitable to life, well suited to a rational nature which has been taught to speak the truth so well on each occasion that its words are regarded as oaths; to swear truly is only, as people say, a second-best voyage, for the mere fact of his swearing casts suspicion on the trustworthiness of the man. Let him, then, lag and linger in the hope that by repeated postponement he may avoid the oath altogether. [Philo, On the Decalogue 17]
Cited in Lachs, Rabbinic Commentary on the New Testament, 100-103.

continued below

Essenes

Although the rabbinic point of view, represented by these quotations, indicates that they wished to limit the oath and/or swearing, they did not as a matter of law prohibit it. The Essenes, on the other hand, were well known for their refusal to take an oath as being contrary to their belief:

6. And truly, as for other things, they do nothing but according to the injunctions of their curators; only these two things are done among them at everyone's own free-will, which are to assist those that want it, and to show mercy; for they are permitted of their own accord to afford succor to such as deserve it, when they stand in need of it, and to bestow food on those that are in distress; but they cannot give any thing to their kindred without the curators. They dispense their anger after a just manner, and restrain their passion. They are eminent for fidelity, and are the ministers of peace; whatsoever they say also is firmer than an oath; but swearing is avoided by them, and they esteem it worse than perjury (4) for they say that he who cannot be believed without [swearing by] God is already condemned. They also take great pains in studying the writings of the ancients, and choose out of them what is most for the advantage of their soul and body; and they inquire after such roots and medicinal stones as may cure their distempers. [Josephus, Jewish Wars II.8.6]

2 Enoch

For I swear to you my children, but I will not swear by a single oath neither by heaven or by earth nor by anything made by God. God said, 'there is no sweating in Me nor injustice but truth.' If there is no truth in men let thou swear by a word, yea yea, nay nay. But I swear to you yea yea.' [Slav Enoch 49:1-2]
Cited in Lachs, Rabbinic Commentary on the New Testament, 100-103.

Rabbinic

The Holy One, blessed be He, said to Israel, 'Do not imagine that you are permitted to swear by My name even in truth ...' [Num. R. 22:1]

R. Huna said: 'The yeas of the righteous are a yea, their nos are a no!" [Ruth R. 3.18]

Cited in Lachs, Rabbinic Commentary on the New Testament, 100-103."