The issue is not whether to love or be compassionate or forgive: at stake is whom do you love or forgive compassionately? On that point, we have almost as many formulae as we have religions.
Buddhism has an excellent record on the love, compassion and forgiveness for all as advocated by the Dalai Lama. Among Christians, denominations like the Quakers and the Amish, have distinguished themselves by abjuring all violence and conflict. They follow literally Jesus’ instruction to Christians to “turn the other cheek” and “to love your enemies.” But the histories of these religions pinpoint the problem: “What do you do when the other party uses violence unjustly?” In the case of the Buddhists of India in the 12th century, they lost hegemony to a renascent Hinduism and were driven back into monasteries in order to practice their religion. The Quakers – Society of Friends, officially – have carved out a small, but important niche in US society as frontline missionaries of compassion. However, their numbers remain very small. The Amish have established communities for their own people, not very different in function from the Buddhist monasteries. The Amish are among those who have learned that you do not need to confront the unjust violence of others if you live alone and apart all the time.
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