THE QUESTION

Millions of people are in mixed faith marriages or are unsure about their conception of God. How would you advise them to describe God to their children over the holiday season?

Posted by Sally Quinn and Jon Meacham on December 6, 2006 11:30 AM

FROM THE PANEL

Donna Freitas is Assistant Professor of Religion at Boston University. The "On Faith" panelist's literary and academic focus is the struggle of belonging and alienation with regard to faith, particularly among young adults, and especially young women. Freitas asks the 'Big Questions' (Why are we here anyway?) and delights in discovering the many forums in which to dabble with faith, religion, spirituality, and gender. A Catholic, she also is an ardent feminist. Her books include Becoming a Goddess of Inner Poise: Spirituality for the Bridget Jones in All of Us, (2005) and Save the Date: A Spirituality of Dating, Love, Dinner & the Divine. Freitas' most recent book project is Sex and the Soul, set for publication in 2007. It is based on a national study about the influence of sexuality and romantic relationships on the spiritual identities of America 's college students. Freitas' first novel, The Possibilities of Sainthood, which is about 15-year Antonia Lucia Labella, who aspires to become the first official living saint in Catholic history, is due for publication in 2008. Freitas can be reached through her website at www.donnafreitas.com.

Give the Gift of the Divine Feminine This Holiday

I hope I am an example to my students—a “parent” of sorts—who has gone from believer to atheist and back again

Donna Freitas, Assistant Professor of Religion, Boston University | 46 COMMENTS
Dec 12, 2006 at 3:46 PM
Daniel C. Dennett is the Austin B. Fletcher Professor of Philosophy, and Co-Director of the Center for Cognitive Studies, at Tufts University. His most recent book was Breaking the Spell (2006). The “On Faith” panelist also is Co-founder of the Curricular Software Studio at Tufts, and has helped design museum exhibits on computers for the Smithsonian Institution, the Museum of Science in Boston, and the Computer Museum in Boston. Dennett has written over 300 scholarly articles on various aspects of the mind in scientific journals. His first book, Content and Consciousness, appeared in 1969. It was followed by Brainstorms (1978), Elbow Room (1984), The Intentional Stance (1987), Consciousness Explained (1991), Darwin's Dangerous Idea (1995), Kinds of Minds (1996), and Brainchildren: A Collection of Essays 1984-1996 (1998). He co-edited The Mind's I with Douglas Hofstadter in 1981. Dennett completed his D.Phil degree work under Gilbert Ryle at Oxford in 1965, and has lectured at Harvard University, Pittsburgh and the École Normale Supérieure in Paris. He has received two Guggenheim Fellowships, a Fulbright Fellowship, and a Fellowship at the Center for Advanced Studies in Behavioral Science. In 1987 he was elected to the American Academy of Arts and Sciences. He spends most of his summers on his farm in Maine, where he harvests blueberries, hay and timber, and makes Normandy cider wine, when he is not sailing. He is also a sculptor.

The Gift of Perspective

A religion that thrives in an atmosphere of shared knowledge deserves to thrive; a religion that depends on enforced ignorance deserves to go extinct.

Daniel C. Dennett, Co-Director, Center for Cognitive Studies, Tufts University | 77 COMMENTS
Dec 8, 2006 at 12:38 PM
"On Faith" panelist Joan Chittister is a Benedictine Sister, former prioress, international lecturer, and award-winning author of 35 books. Her weekly web column, "From Where I Stand," which she writes for the National Catholic Reporter newspaper, has a regular readership of more than 10,000. Chittister, who was prioress of the Benedictine Sisters of Erie for 12 years, also served as president of the Leadership Conference of Women Religious, an organization of the leaders of the 65,000 Catholic religious women in this country. She is co-chair of the Global Peace Initiative of Women, a UN partnership organization that seeks to facilitate a worldwide network of peace-builders, particularly in the Middle East. Chittister holds a master's degree from the University of Notre Dame and a doctorate in communications from Penn State University. She is the founder and executive director of Benetvision, a resource and research center for contemporary spirituality located in Erie. Her most recent books include The Ten Commandments: Laws of the Heart (2006); The Tent of Abraham: Stories of Hope and Peace for Christians, Muslims and Jews, coauthored with Rabbi Arthur Waskow and Neil Douglas-Klotz (2006); Called to Question: A Spiritual Memoir (2004) and In Search of Belief (2006).

I Too Was the Child In-Between

Clearly, the problem is not that the mind of a child is unable to grasp the notion of a God who loves everyone...No, the problem lies in the mind of adults who want to own everything. Even God

Joan Chittister, osb, Award-winning author and columnist | 206 COMMENTS
Dec 8, 2006 at 12:10 PM
The Reverend William McD. Tully has been rector of St. Bartholomew's Episcopal Church in New York City since September 1994. The first professional calling of the “On Faith” panelist was to journalism, and he worked as a copy boy and local reporter at the Los Angeles Times. As a community worker for the Model Cities program at the Columbia University Graduate School of Journalism, Tully discerned an "underlying call" that turned him toward ordained ministry and study at the General Theological Seminary. After ordination in 1974, he served as curate at the Church of the Epiphany, Manhattan; associate rector at St. Francis Church, Potomac, Maryland; and then as rector of St. Columba's Church, Washington, D.C. The people and mission of St. Columba's taught Tully about church growth, Christian hospitality and hope for the future of the church. Working with a dedicated group of leaders, an enlarged clergy and professional staff at St. Bart’s, Tully has led the church in its growth and renewal. He loves his ministry and is always eager to meet and work with others who have found a home and a ministry at St. Bart's.

Parents Need to Get A Life, I Mean A Spiritual Life

Be honest if you don’t know much about God. Don’t yield to the pressure of the season and say or do things you don’t mean. You might even read a book together

William Tully, Rector of St. Bartholomew's Episcopal Church in New York City | 22 COMMENTS
Dec 8, 2006 at 11:50 AM
"On Faith" panelist Ada Maria Isasi-Diaz is Professor of Social Christian Ethics and Theology at Drew University. The first Latina in the United States to receive a doctorate degree in theology, Isasi-Diaz developed "mujerista" theology, which reflects the perspective of Latinas in the United States, as well as their religious experiences and practices. Isasi-Diaz lectures at universities,seminaries and religious organizations on Latina and Latino issues in church and society, as well as on the liberation of all women. Born and raised in Cuba, Isasi-Diaz keeps close ties with women in the Caribbean, Latin America and other developing areas.

Living With An Understanding of God Is Best Lesson

The issue is not how we describe God to the children. Unless we know who is God for us and how we live in the ordinariness of everyday life our understanding of God, we will not be able to describe God to our children.

Ada Maria Isasi Diaz, Professor of Social Christian Ethics and Theology, Drew University | 35 COMMENTS
Dec 7, 2006 at 4:49 PM
"On Faith" panelist Starhawk is a prominent voice in modern Wiccan spirituality and cofounder of Reclaiming (www.reclaiming.org), an activist branch of modern Pagan religion. She is the author or coauthor of ten books, including The Spiral Dance: A Rebirth of the Ancient Religion of the Great Goddess (1979) --considered an essential text for the Neo-Pagan movement--and the novel The Fifth Sacred Thing (1993) . Her works have been translated into Spanish, French, German, Danish, Dutch, Italian, Portuguese, Polish, Greek, Japanese, and Burmese. Many of Starhawk's political essays were collected into her book Webs of Power: Notes from the Global Uprising . Her newest book is The Earth Path: Grounding Your Spirit in the Rhythms of Nature . Starhawk has also recorded several tapes and CDs; most recently Wicca for Beginners (2002), Wiccan Rituals and Blessings (2003), and a four-CD set Earth Magic (2006), all produced by Sounds True. She consulted on and contributed to three films known as the Women's Spirituality series, directed by Donna Read for the National Film Board of Canada: Goddess Remembered, The Burning Times, and Full Circle . Committed to bringing the techniques and creative power of spirituality to political activism, Starhawk travels internationally teaching magic, the tools of ritual, and the skills of activism.

Different Religions Like Different Paths Through the Forest

"Can you think of a place that you love, a special, beautiful place, where you feel wild and free, loved and loving, and safe and happy all at once? Being in that place is being connected to the Goddess, the living being that we are all a part of."

Starhawk, Co-founder, Reclaiming | 64 COMMENTS
Dec 7, 2006 at 3:45 PM
Zalman Schachter-Shalomi, better known as "Reb Zalman," is a foremost authority on Hasidism and Jewish mysticism. Born in Poland and raised in Vienna, the “On Faith” panelist fled Nazi oppression and arrived in the United States in 1941. He enrolled in the Lubavitcher Hasidim yeshiva and was ordained by Lubavitch in 1947. After serving as a congregational rabbi in Massachusetts, and earning a master’s degree in pastoral counseling at Boston University, Schachter-Shalomi taught at the University of Manitoba, Canada (1956-1975). In 1968, he earned his Doctor of Hebrew Letters from Hebrew Union College. He also was "divorced" from the Lubavitcher Hasidim because of his controversial engagements with modern culture and other religions. Continuing as an "independent" hasid, Schachter-Shalomi taught the experiential dimensions of Hasidism as one of the world's great spiritual traditions. In 1969, he founded ALEPH: Alliance for Jewish Renewal with a small circle of students. In 1975, he moved to Temple University where he was professor of Jewish Mysticism and Psychology of Religion until 1987. Schachter-Shalomi has participated in interfaith discussions throughout the world, including the widely influential dialogue with the Dalai Lama, documented in the book, The Jew in the Lotus. In another interfaith endeavor, Schachter-Shalomi studied Sufism in California, which led to his initiation as a sheikh in the Sufi Order of Hazrat Inayat Khan in 1975. Ten years later, Schachter-Shalomi made a 40-day retreat at New Mexico’s Lama Foundation and emerged with a new teaching that became the foundation of his book, From Age-ing to Sage-ing, and the catalyst for the Spiritual Eldering movement. He also is the author of Wrapped in a Holy Flame: Teachings and Tales of the Hasidic Masters. His latest book is Jewish with Feeling: A Guide to Meaningful Jewish Practice, written with Joel Segel. In 1995 he accepted the World Wisdom Chair at the Naropa Institute (now Naropa University) in Boulder, Colorado, where he taught contemplative Judaism and ecumenical spirituality. Retiring from Naropa in 2004, Schachter-Shalomi co-founded The Desert Fellowship of the Sufi-Hasidic Maimuni al-Badieh Order with Netanel Miles-Yepez, combining Jewish Hasidic tradition with Islamic Sufi tradition. He lives in Boulder.

God's Corner

It would be good to designate a place in your home to become God's corner.

Zalman Schachter Shalomi, Co-founder, The Desert Fellowship of the Sufi-Hasidic Maimuni al-Badieh Order | 50 COMMENTS
Dec 7, 2006 at 12:00 PM
Susan Jacoby is the author of The Age of American Unreason. She began her writing career as a reporter for The Washington Post, and has been a contributor to a wide range of periodicals and newspapers for more than 25 years on topics including law, religion, medicine, aging, women's rights, political dissent in the Soviet Union and Russian literature. Jacoby has been the recipient of grants from the Guggenheim, Rockefeller and Ford Foundations, as well as the National Endowment for the Humanities. In 2001-2002, she was named a fellow at the Center for Scholars and Writers at the New York Public Library. Jacoby’s other books include Freethinkers: A History of American Secularism (2004); Wild Justice: The Evolution of Revenge, a Pulitzer Prize finalist in 1984, and Half-Jew: A Daughter's Search for Her Family's Buried Past. She is working on a book about the relationship between American anti-intellectualism and political polarization, to be published by Pantheon in 2008. Her photo is by Chris Ramir.

Doubt: The Perfect Gift

My mom, who was a practicing Catholic, simply replied "I don't know" when I asked why God would put a child in an iron lung. She was honest--and more power to her.

Susan Jacoby, Author and reporter | 174 COMMENTS
Dec 7, 2006 at 11:25 AM
“On Faith” panelist Michael Otterson has served as director of media relations for The Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints since 1997. As senior spokesman for the church, Otterson has worked with most major publications, TV and radio networks, and other news media in the United States and overseas on issues ranging from the 2002 Winter Olympics in Salt Lake City to the Church’s burgeoning international growth and diversity. A convert to the Mormon faith, he worked as a journalist for 11 years before being appointed director of the Church’s public affairs office in London in 1976 – the first such office outside the United States. After opening and managing a new Pacific Area public affairs office in Australia, Otterson moved to the United States in 1991 to help oversee the church’s international public affairs from its Salt Lake City headquarters. In a church that operates worldwide with a lay clergy, Otterson has served twice as a stake president (leader of a group of church congregations), in both England and Australia. He is now a US citizen.

A Parent's Gift To A Child: Speaking of God

n my Latter-day Saint faith, the responsibility upon parents to teach their children principles of the gospel is scripturally mandated

Michael Otterson, Media relations director, The Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints | 40 COMMENTS
Dec 7, 2006 at 11:15 AM
Marcus J. Borg holds the Hundere Chair in Religion and Culture in the Philosophy Department at Oregon State University. A fellow of the Jesus Seminar, he has served as national chair of the Historical Jesus Section of the Society of Biblical Literature and co-chair of its International New Testament Program Committee, and is past president of the Anglican Association of Biblical Scholars. The “On Faith” panelist is the author of 14 books, including Jesus: A New Vision, The God We Never Knew, God at 2000, The Heart of Christianity and the best-selling Meeting Jesus Again for the First Time. Borg also is a regular columnist for www.beliefnet.com. His work has been translated into nine languages. His latest book, Jesus: The Relevance of a Religious Revolutionary, was published in November, 2006.

Don't Tell Them Anything They'll Need to Unlearn

The Bible and other sacred scriptures are not fairy tales – but we make a mistake when we think that stories must be factually true in order to be true and truthful

Marcus Borg, Former president, Anglican Association of Biblical Scholars | 104 COMMENTS
Dec 6, 2006 at 5:40 PM
"On Faith" panelist Stephen Prothero is Chair of the Department of Religion at Boston University and author of numerous books on American religion, most recently Religious Literacy: What Every American Needs to Know--And Doesn't (2007). His American Jesus: How the Son of God Became a National Icon (2003) was named by Publisher's Weekly as one of the best religion books for 2003. His first book, The White Buddhist: The Asian Odyssey of Henry Steel Olcott (1996), was awarded the Best First Book in the History of Religions for 1996 by the American Academy of Religion. He has commented on religion on dozens of National Public Radio programs, and on television on CNN, NBC, FOX and PBS. A regular contributor to the Wall Street Journal, he has also written for The Washington Post , the New York Times, Slate Magazine, Salon , the Los Angeles Times and the Boston Globe . Prothero can be reached through his website at http://www.stephenprothero.com.

Say Something!

If you don’t talk with your children about religion, they will assume it doesn’t mean anything to you

Stephen Prothero, Chair, Department of Religion, Boston University | 38 COMMENTS
Dec 6, 2006 at 5:15 PM
Baroness Julia Neuberger is an ordained rabbi and member of Britian's House of Lords. The "On Faith" panelist also is a trustee of the British Council, Jewish Care, and the Booker Prize Foundation, as well as founding trustee of the Walter and Liesel Schwab Charitable Trust. She has served as Chairman of Camden & Islington Community Health Services NHS Trust and Chief Executive of the King's Fund—a major independent health charity. Currently she chairs the Commission on the Future of Volunteering in England . In the House of Lords, she is a Liberal Democrat member and in early 2006 she was Bloomberg Professor at Harvard University Divinity School . Neuberger writes, speaks, makes trouble, and has published several books, of which the latest is The Moral State We're In (2006). She is working on a book about old age, and thinking about a new book on death and dying, as well as one as a counterblast to Richard Dawkins on why religion is so important in the rather godless United Kingdom.

Parents Should Share Doubts As Well as Beliefs

It would help if they were prepared to talk to their children about their doubts as well as their faith, about the fact that we all worship the same God

Julia Neuberger, Chair, Commission on the Future of Volunteering in England | 6 COMMENTS
Dec 6, 2006 at 4:30 PM
"On Faith" panelist and rock musician Salman Ahmad founded the popular South Asian band Junoon. The group has sold over 25 million albums and in 2001 became the first rock band invited to perform at the U.N. General Assembly. Ahmad also was appointed U.N. Goodwill Ambassador for HIV/AIDS. He personalized the "I Care, Do You?" U.N. poster campaign in Pakistan by taking the well-known verse of the Koran about reverence for human life and paraphrasing it to say: "Saving one life (from AIDS) is like saving the whole of humanity." Born in Pakistan , Ahmad grew up in New York . He obtained his medical degree from Pakistan 's King Edward Medical college in Lahore . He helped form Pakistan 's first pop band, Vital Signs , whose debut album sold a million copies. Ahmad decided to give up his stethoscope and pick up his guitar, and after leaving Vital Signs in 1990 he founded Junoon. Recently Ahmad appeared in two documentary films: It's My Country Too , about Muslim-Americans, and Rockstar and the Mullahs . Both were broadcast worldwide on PBS and the BBC. A passionate activist in promoting peace between India and Pakistan , Ahmad made a song/video Ghoom Tana . It is on his latest solo album INFINITI.

God Is Within, the Sufi Poet Wrote

My advice to people who are seeking God is to look within their own hearts

Salman Ahmad, Founder, Junoon | 67 COMMENTS
Dec 6, 2006 at 2:43 PM
"On Faith" panelist Jonathan D. Sarna is the Joseph H. & Belle R. Braun Professor of American Jewish History at Brandeis University and Director of its Hornstein Jewish Professional Leadership Program. Sarna served two terms as chair of Brandeis' Department of Near Eastern & Judaic Studies. He now chairs the Academic Advisory and Editorial Board of the Jacob Rader Marcus Center of the American Jewish Archives and is chief historian of the National Museum of American Jewish History in Philadelphia . Before returning to his alma mater to teach in 1990, Sarna was on the faculty of Hebrew Union College-Jewish Institute of Religion in Cincinnati from 1979-1990. There, he was Professor of American Jewish history and Director of the Center for the Study of the American Jewish Experience. He has also taught at Yale University , where he earned his doctorate in 1979, at the University of Cincinnati , and at the Hebrew University in Jerusalem . The Forward newspaper named Sarna one of America 's 50 most influential American Jews. He has written, edited, or co-edited more than 20 books, including the acclaimed American Judaism: A History, which won the Jewish Book Council's “Jewish Book of the Year Award” in 2004.

Celebrating Both Chanukah and Christmas Confuses Children

Mixed faith couples who celebrate both Chanukah and Christmas in their homes do their children and themselves a disservice

Jonathan D. Sarna, Professor American Jewish History, Brandeis University | 26 COMMENTS
Dec 6, 2006 at 11:44 AM
Rev. Susan Brooks Thistlethwaite is president of Chicago Theological Seminary and senior fellow at the Center for American Progress. She has been a professor of theology at the seminary for 20 years and director of its graduate degree center for five years. Her area of expertise is contextual theologies of liberation, specializing in issues of violence and violation. An ordained minister of the United Church of Christ since 1974, the “On Faith” panelist is the author or editor of thirteen books and has been a translator for two translations of the Bible. Her works include Casting Stones: Prostitution and Liberation in Asia and the United States (1996) and The New Testament and Psalms: An Inclusive Translation (1995). Since the September 11, 2001 terrorist attacks, Thistlethwaite has been working diligently to promote peace, including a presentation at the U.S. Institute of Peace, which appears in one of their special reports. Most recently she edited and contributed to Adam, Eve and the Genome: Theology in Dialogue with the Human Genome Project (2003).

You Can't Go Wrong with 'God is Love'.

This holiday season, give this gift to your children and to yourself: You are loved, unconditionally. Believe me when I tell you that everything else in religion is commentary.

Susan Brooks Thistlethwaite, President, Chicago Theological Seminary | 18 COMMENTS
Dec 6, 2006 at 11:43 AM
Irish-born John Dominic Crossan is a professor emeritus in the religious studies department at DePaul University in Chicago. Between 1950 and 1969, he was a member of a 13th-century Roman Catholic religious order, the Servites, and remained an ordained priest from 1957 to 1969. He has delivered lectures to secular and lay audiences from Scandinavia to Australia to Japan to South Africa. The On Faith panelist has authored 23 books and his writings have been translated into 11 languages. His work focuses on the historical Jesus, earliest Christianity and the historical Paul. Core titles include “The Historical Jesus,” “The Birth of Christianity” and “In Search of Paul,” co-written with archaeologist Jonathan L. Reed. Dr. Crossan’s next book, “God & Empire: Jesus Against Rome Then and Now,” is scheduled for publication in February. The professor earned a doctor of divinity degree at St. Patrick’s College in Maynooth, Ireland and a humanities doctorate at Stetson University in Florida. The American Academy of Religion and DePaul and Stetson universities have recognized him with awards for scholarly excellence. His Web site is www.johndominiccrossan.com.

Are We Hard-Wired for God?

We are hard-wired to name the transcendental meaning by which we commit ourselves to live human lives in the certainty of human death

John Dominic Crossan, Lecturer and professor emeritus, DePaul University | 68 COMMENTS
Dec 6, 2006 at 11:41 AM
Martin E. Marty is Fairfax M. Cone Distinguished Service Professor Emeritus at the University of Chicago, where he taught religious history, chiefly in the Divinity School, for 35 years, and where the Martin Marty Center has been founded to promote “public religion” endeavors. For a decade prior to entering academia, the “On Faith” panelist served parishes in the west and northwest suburbs of Chicago as an ordained Lutheran pastor. Marty is the author of more than 50 books including Righteous Empire: The Protestant Experience in America (1970), for which he won the National Book Award. His additional honors include the National Humanities Medal, the Medal of the American Academy of Arts and Sciences, the University of Chicago Alumni Medal, the Distinguished Service Medal of the Association of Theological Schools, and the Order of Lincoln Medallion (Illinois’ top honor). Marty has served as president of the American Academy of Religion, the American Society of Church History, and the American Catholic Historical Association. He also has served on two U.S. Presidential Commissions and was director of the Fundamentalism Project of the American Academy of Arts and Sciences and the Public Religion Project at the University of Chicago. He is Senior Regent of St. Olaf College in Northfield, Minnesota.

Trust The Child

The point of it all in the child's world is to let the love which the faiths profess be experienced by the way in which parents and siblings relate to each other when they talk about God

Martin Marty, Award-winning author and professor emeritus, University of Chicago | 3 COMMENTS
Dec 6, 2006 at 11:40 AM

READER RESPONSE

» Dinah | I would quote William Penn:--"To mend the world is true religion." The Holiday season reflects the WILL of all major religions. A future where equal...
» Corey | Describing God in an interfaith marriage is not the problem. The teaching about God in most major faiths are too similar to have any discord. It is ...
» RosaSion | Ann is right when she says we should listen to how our children describe God. Recently an extremely racist man was admitted to the hospital where my ...
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On Faith is an interactive conversation on religion moderated by Newsweek Editor Jon Meacham and Sally Quinn of The Washington Post. It is produced jointly by Newsweek and washingtonpost.com, as is PostGlobal, a conversation on international affairs. Please send your comments, questions and suggestions for On Faith to editor and producer David Waters.